Published in Demokracija magazine, Slovenia, on 16th February 2017
Polona Mursec is an International Neuro Linguistic Programming Trainer, who has developed her own programmes for personal transformation. We have had a conversation with her on the topic of “how to find purpose in today’s times and what should the leaders be like “…
You are University Graduate Lawyer with bar examination who has worked in courts for a few years. How come that a soul like you decided to pick such a rational and demanding study?
At the age of 19, an age by which we need to select a career in Slovenia, only a few young people know exactly what they really want to do with their life. I decided to study law because I wanted to study something which would open many doors for me in the future, also there were high expectations due to my academic success and my personality.
Then tectonic shift happened in your life – you left the profession of the lawyer behind and moved to London to do the retraining. You are saying that this decision changed the way you see your life.
That is true. Year 2011 was a life changing year for me. I can say I was “awakened”. Human beings are comfort beings. We love to feel safe and cosy, nobody likes pain, shocks and failures in life, however they are inevitably leading us to a higher state of consciousness.
I awoke whilst working for one of the big corporations in Slovenia. For the first time in my life, I experienced how harmful a working environment can be (especially considering it’s where we spend most of day), and the effect that can have on our wellbeing.
My body has always been really closely connected with nature. I have been very open for energies and have strong intuitions. I can say I have been highly sensitive – but not sensitive as people normally understand this term – for example like a person who gets easily hurt. When I speak about sensitivity, I refer to my very close energetic connection with people and places. Without the need for the person to explain what is going on in their lives, I can easily feel their energetic level and understand what is happening in their life and where the changes are needed. This is a huge advantage in my therapy practice as it enables me to achieve very extraordinary results in a short period of time.
Anyway, back to the story, as I am very open to energies, my body absorbed a lot of negative energy that was established in the working environment. That exhausted my physical body. I suffered a burn out, experienced apathy and lost all my motivation. I knew something was very wrong as I was always a very optimistic and positive person.
When you hit rock bottom, you are ready to open to new dimensions of life. I was ready to ask myself two basic questions “Who am I?” and “What is my purpose in life?”
Based on these two questions, I received a clear insight on what my role in this life is and where my path shall lead me in the future. Upon receiving this insight, I closed an old chapter of my life and stepped out towards a brand-new life.
… and thus, you arrived in London?
My first change was moving to London and qualifying as an International Neuro Linguistic Programming Trainer (NLP) and Coach. I have always had a massive interest in human nature – how far we can develop and how much potential we explore in our life. I am deeply grateful to my mother and father for this. My mother used to buy me a lot of books on personal and spiritual development and my dad was very closely connected with nature.
I was never interested in psychology as I found that study too rational and I felt that my purpose lay in transcending our rational way of living. NLP appealed to me as a good start. I need to expose here that people nowadays sell many studies under the NLP label and I wanted to learn the original and authentic NLP straight from one of its co-developers, John Grinder.
There is a saying on your web page to “Find your purpose”. Do you think that human beings have a common purpose or do each of us have an individual purpose?
I personally believe that each of us has two purposes in life. Firstly, one needs to wake up from collective dreams and secondly one needs to find the special gift that fulfils them and share that gift with others.
When I speak about waking up from collective dreams, I refer to the state of consciousness that we are currently living in and which is based on fear. People fear all sorts of things and live with many limiting beliefs about their capabilities and abilities. This phenomenon can be easily seen in an energetic picture of a person – life energy is blocked and consequently people suffer psychical and psychological consequences. In other words, people live in the darkness. They cannot see their real colours.
If we are aware, we can see more and more people waking up from this collective dream and connecting with their real nature. They are stepping in the paradigm of light and love. This can happen completely automatically, and it takes years for the person to realise what exactly has happened. That was my experience too. It took me years to rationally understand a huge jump in the way I was experiencing myself and the world around me. These sorts of things happen beyond our rational mind and that makes it is difficult to put them into words. In order to be understood, they need to be experienced.
It seems like that this is our next evolutionary step, our common faith.
When a person wakes up from collective dreams and connects with love and light inside and connects with the present moment, one loses their egoistic touch of life and self-importance. A person becomes very altruistic and outwardly focused. They do not fulfil the personal dreams that serves their purpose anymore. Everyone feels deep within what it is that they want to share with the world. Some start practicing art, others become teachers and guides, who are showing others their way out of the darkness, some discover revolutionary inventions. Albert Einstein and Nikola Tesla are such people and nowadays scientists try to comprehend their teachings on a rational level, but both declared specifically that they discovered their amazing inventions while transcending their rational way of living. Studying this phenomenon by using our rational ability to understand, will never bring the right results. One needs to dive into this dimension and transcend their rational mind in order to grasp the full meaning and purpose of it.
All the above mentioned presents the heart of my work.
Worldly renowned psychiatrist Victor Frankl was known for his formulation “Will for purpose”. He wanted to state that the most important thing in life is to find purpose. Do you think we need to find our purpose globally or is it enough that we find purpose in our everyday situations and actions?
It is difficult to imagine how someone can find purpose in simple things in life – like witnessing a sunrise, when someone lives in the paradigm of fear.
Living in the paradigm of fear is like experiencing the world through dark glasses; we perceive ourselves and the world though rational mind only and that washes the colours away from our life. Rational mind loves complexity and thus it complicates our lives very much. It does not notice or cherish simple things.
The above-mentioned fact is very easy to spot whilst teaching mindfulness classes. I offer participants a very simple exercise – they need to be present with their breath. For a certain period, they need to focus on their breath solely and notice every time their attention vanishes to the past or present. Only a few people realise the importance of such a simple act as we are conditioned to complicate our lives constantly and therefore, we often feel empty inside.
One of the clear signs of awakening to higher consciousness is that a person can enjoy very simple moments in life. With higher consciousness, all senses come back to life and consequently everything around seems so alive, so magical. This is a similar state that we experience when we fall in love. Eventually, the process is the same, with only one difference. When you fall in love with a person, you fall in love with an individual. Here you fall in love with life itself. You fall in love with life’s magic and thus you start to find purpose in everything that you do, in everything that is and that will be; individually and globally.
You are International NLP Trainer and Transformation Trainer. Could you specify how NLP and transformation really work?
NLP served me like a platform upon which I started exploring human potential in depth. NLP consists of interesting tools that help individuals to achieve personal and professional goals as well as it contains good models of communication. But I need to emphasise that I found a few mistakes and missing points in the model itself, therefore I only use those NLP principles and tools that are effective. NLP was set up by two men who are very rational and that is very notorious in the model itself. I was missing depth in the NLP model. However, I managed to upgrade this deficiency with many other philosophies and practices like Mindfulness, Buddhism and Integral Yoga. I also need to add that I was very influenced by one of the greatest Slovenian thinkers, Martin Kojc.
I have managed to merge all this broad range of knowledge and wisdom and create my own personal transformation programmes, whose main intention is integral transformation of a person’s life and elevation of their consciousness.
Retreats for higher awareness that you are running, are held in the colourful Algarve Area in Portugal and on Sommerøy island, in Norway. Is the selection of the place for such retreats important?
Selection of the places where this retreat is held, is one of the most important factors. I cannot imagine holding these sorts of retreats in let’s say London, where I lived for a few years. When it comes to location for a retreat, my business partner from Norway and I are very selective. Luckily, we are both very intuitive and we can easily sense the energy of the environment and people in it, therefore we can easily select appropriate places that have a very good impact on our participants.
One the main goals of our work is to return people back to where they belong – in the nature. Nature is in us and a part of us. The frequencies that we find in the nature, put our brains and cells into alpha and theta states of being. These states are the states in which our minds calm down and inner peace awakens. Therefore, it’s not surprising at all that people who live in the nature, are in general happier, healthier and more satisfied in life.
How do these retreats “far away from the maddening crowd” look like and what do participants gain by attending them?
Our retreats look a bit like very active holiday with a great emphasis on personal and spiritual growth. A person, who wants to participate, buys a package and from the moment of arrival at the airport until the moment of leaving, they are under our care.
In Portugal, as well as in Norway, we accommodate our participants in very ideal complexes where all their needs are met and their stay extremely pleasant.
We start every day with the Flow Programme. The Flow Programme is my own invention, it replicates my life lasting love for sport as well as strong elements of personal and spiritual growth.
Mornings are very active, we spend time together in our classrooms, educating participants about personal and spiritual growth, whilst afternoon is reserved for “me time”. Participants do what they desire, from walks in the nature, reading books, sunbathing and swimming in the pool… Three times per week we organise special excursions in the afternoon, for which the main intention is to show participants the surrounding area and get acquainted with the local life and people. One of their favourites excursions is for example, riding horses along the breathtaking beaches and the ocean.
Evenings are reserved for art like music, dancing and singing.
We live for one week like one big family. We share tears of laughter and tears of pain and relief when participants take off their masks and share freely their life experiences. A lot of the time during the retreat is reserved for individual coachings, through which we help participants to break through all the obstacles that are holding them back from living free and a happy life.
In this world of ours, where people are so accustomed to wearing masks, it is unusual for people to take off their masks and open up in front of complete strangers. However, during our retreats they do, and they can do it in an environment which supports them and does not judge them. Most of the people actually experience true meaning of unconditional love for the first time in life during our retreats. Magical bonds are created between participants and us for which I’m sure they will last until the end of this life.
I need to add that each single participant that ever attended our retreats, lives a very different life nowadays. During the retreat people start realising their own worth and they become conscious of who they are, what they truly desire in life and what is truly important to them. Then it’s our turn to help them to break through fears and limiting beliefs that keep them imprisoned and help them to create lives that they desire and deserve.
You are recently active with your training in Slovenia too. How do participants respond to “resetting” of their brains and spirit?
That is true. For the last 6 years, my work was linked to foreign countries (United Kingdom, Norway, Portugal) only and in the recent months my business partner from Norway and I decided to spread parts of our work to Slovenia too. I like to come back to Slovenia, I have my family and my friends who are here.
I have noticed that Slovenian people show more and more interest in my work. I am receiving many messages and emails on a daily basis, expressing their gratitude to me for sharing my thoughts and encouragements on Facebook. More and more people also stop me on the street or they approach me in restaurants to shake my hand and hug me as they find themselves enthralled with what I write.
Recently, I set up a very special concept Group Meditations in a Salt House with my friend Nina, who runs a Salt House in Radovljica. The concept is very fresh, but already very successful. I also run individual coachings and Golden Glow Therapy in the Salt House. Golden Glow Therapy is a very special concept that I developed together with my friend from Slovenia with the intention of removing energetic blockages in our bodies and raise our level of consciousness.
On Facebook you put down very actual thoughts for this time: “We are missing real leaders … We are missing people who have courage, values and hearts in the right place… Those who will not sell their soul for any amount of money nor for any public voice …” This idea seems like mission impossible in the Western world, where everything is valued though the aspect of money. Is there hope for honest and hearty people to take on leading positions?
Hope dies last. The world needs changes and different people in leading positions.
There is a very simple logic. A person who is satisfied with who they are and with their life, naturally support and uplifts others.
On the other hand, a leader who lives in fear, battles with negative thoughts and personal issues constantly and as they are “blind”, constantly project these issues on the world outside – on the people who are under their leadership. This sort of a leader creates an environment where there is no trust, no respect and a lack of free-flowing information. This sort of a leader creates a toxic environment in which values are denied and overruled.
I am not surprised that so many people suffer burn out syndromes in Slovenia. Spending 8 to 10 hours in a toxic environment, which does not respect you, nor cherish you, where what you do and accomplish is not visible, but your mistakes are, where power which comes with the role of being a leader, is abused, has extreme effects upon a person’s health.
Why am I mentioning Slovenia? Because Slovenia stands out in this field. Unfortunately, many people come to a position of a leader upon certain personal connections and acquaintances. They do not need to present or exercise any level of communicational skills, emotional intelligence, nor leadership skills when they occupy their positions. And then they lead companies and organisations according to their level of personal (im)maturity.
You are innovative in this field also?
I am a person of action and solutions, therefore my business partner from Norway and I set up a special concept, which we named Emerald Leadership Academy. Its main idea is to become a leader without position. Most of the leadership programmes teach leaders how to deal with people. We deal with leaders. We work on leaders unconscious programmes and beliefs, we help them to get rid of fears and limiting beliefs and thus raise their level of consciousness.
It is a fact that real leaders are those people whom people follow by choice, because they recognise in them the highest of values, like authenticity, congruency and integrity. Once the person reaches this level of existence, they naturally support and uplift others. This sort of a leader knows by intuition how to serve people and easily creates trust, respect and harmony in the environment and that leads to great results.